About our Cash Registry:
Tommy currently drives a 1987 Ford Escort that he received as a gift three years ago. While it has been a great blessing, it is deteriorating and rapidly becoming expensive to maintain in a reliable condition. We believe that purchasing a newer, more reliable car that will last for several years would be wiser than trying to keep Tommy's current car running. We need help with this and would love to receive a monetary gift from you instead of an item off one of our other registries. We have set up a registry where you can give a monetary gift to us, so if you are interested in blessing us in this way, click the link below to "Our Wishing Well."
Thanks!
http://www.ourwishingwell.com/registries/view/16544108
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
Acquaintances...Friends...Engaged
How We Met
Ali and I (Tommy) have been attending the same church (New Community) in Spokane for the past four years; she was a small group leader for a college women’s group, and I worked at the church as an intern and then on staff. So we knew about each other and occasionally ran into one another at different times, but we really wouldn’t have considered ourselves to be friends (even acquaintances would have been a stretch). I remember being impressed with what I heard of Ali and in the little interaction we did have, but since I really didn’t know her and our circle of friends didn’t overlap, I never got past the thought: “she seems like someone I could really like to get to know.”
Well, this past February we ran into each other again at a prayer and worship night at New Community and I was once again impressed with Ali and thought to myself, “man, it’s too bad we don’t know each other better, I wonder if anything could be done about that...” As a result, I became much more aware of her presence on Sunday mornings and looked forward to seeing her and possibly “running into her” casually as everyone milled about before and after the services. Well, I wasn’t really sure what to do, but since I knew I definitely didn’t want to just sit back and do nothing (I was way too interested in Ali to be content with that) I decided that the best thing to do was pray and ask God to intervene somehow. So I did; I told God that I really desired to get to know Ali better, but I didn’t want to move forward unless it was clear that this was part of His plan. God worked on me for a few weeks and actually brought me to a place where I could honestly say that I could be content even if Ali wasn’t for me (though I was really hoping that wasn’t the case).
So I focused on school and post-graduation planning and started to pursue an aviation job that would take me away from Spokane. In the meantime, I didn’t avoid Ali, but I also didn’t go out of my way to talk to her. Then came the Sunday before spring break at the end of March; I ran into Ali (quite unintentionally) and her friends and as we chatted she invited me up to her house to have dinner with her and her roommates later that week.
I (Ali) had no interest in Tommy at this point. I had seen him from a distance and had run into him multiple times, but really didn’t know him. He was someone that I perceived as really cool, and I was interested in getting to know him, but as far as romantic interest- there was none. I am pretty traditional and if I had any interest in him I never would have invited him over- that would have been me, a female initiating. I actually partially felt bad that he was eating alone, I hate eating alone. I enjoy getting to know people, so Rachie (one of my housemates) and I invited him to dinner.
It turned out that it was totally innocent; I was house sitting for some friends and Ali felt bad for me having dinner by myself and thought it would be nice for me to be able to eat with some other people. Of course I accepted the invitation gladly and went up later that week to eat with them. Now at this point, I still wasn’t convinced that I could pursue her, so I spent the time on the way to and from her house talking myself into being ok with just being friends and not getting any hopes up. The three or so hours that I spent at her house that night were great and I came away thinking that I definitely liked her and wanting to hope that maybe God was answering my prayer and giving me the go ahead to pursue her.
I like to say Tommy spent four hours at our house. I was very impressed by his intentionality and genuine interest in everyone at the table. He asked each person specific questions about there lives. He brought the conversation past surface questions effortlessly. I really enjoyed dinner with him, and Rachie, and Dustin. What I was not ready for was the next morning! I woke up thinking about Tommy! I felt ridiculous! I thought: Ali, how can you like someone you have only spent 4 hours with?! However, the thoughts about Tommy didn’t go away. So, I combated them with prayer. I decided each time I thought about Tommy, I would just pray: Lord, if these desires are from you, may I win his heart quickly, for in several weeks I go home to California. At this point, I had NO idea he was interested in me. He had shown no signs at dinner of being interested in me at all. I thought I was praying a ridiculous prayer. Basically, I thought I was asking for a miracle. There were about 8 weeks of school left and I was going to be spending the next 2 of them in Israel.
Well, more opportunities arose over the next two months to spend time together in groups, and then by ourselves on occasion and it didn’t take me long to decide that I wanted to pursue a relationship with Ali on more serious terms. I had already decided that God had given me the green light and so after speaking with my parents about my interest in Ali, I decided that I would tell Ali about my feelings on a hike we had already planned for later that week.
Ok, I always hated it when girls ditched girls for guys. I had watched so many friends do it to me, that I swore I would never do that. Well, I was hanging out with one of my good friends Liv, and Tommy called to see if I wanted to go sit at the hanger while he manned the radio so a friend of his could fly, but he wanted me to go within the hour. I was worried that if I declined his invitation he would interpret it as me rejecting him. So, with knots in my stomach, I cut my time with Liv short and went to the hanger with Tommy. One of the things that impressed me the most in all these times of hanging out with Tommy is that each time we hung out, he asked my plans for the next day or rest of the week. Then, whenever he invited me to do something, he would mention what he knew I already had planned. For example, when he invited me to go to the hanger he said “I know you were going to grade the psychology exams, so you don’t have to come, but I was wondering if you wanted to come grade them and keep me company while my friend flies.” I was very impressed that he both remembered and considered my schedule each time we hung out. (the best part… he still does!)
So the day of the hike came, and after picking Ali up at her house, we drove to the house where I lived and walked from there to the trailhead.
It was before this hike that I said to my housemate Amy: “Ok, if he doesn’t make his intentions clear tonight, I have to pull back. My heart is too invested. I am too interested in him to hang out one-on-one if this isn’t going anywhere.” I knew that I needed to place boundaries on our time if my heart was going places other than friendship and his wasn’t.
My initial thought had been that I would express my interest to Ali when we got to a waterfall that is on the hike; however, once we got there, we discovered that we had company…mosquitos. So, needless to say, we didn’t stay there but kept on hiking as I switched over to plan B – sit on the bluff overlooking the town and tell her then. I hadn’t intended on doing this part of the hike initially, so I didn’t have a pre-planned route to get from the waterfall to the bluff. Basically that meant taking trails that looked like they went in the direction I was trying to go and hoping they actually made it there. I knew there were enough trails that we would get there, and, worse case scenario, it would just take a little longer than it might otherwise have taken, which, given the fact that I was really enjoying our time together, wasn’t a bad thing at all.
Well, we made it, and found a nice spot to sit, rest, drink some water, and talk while looking over the town. We talked about random things for a little while and finally I decided, “ok, it’s time.” So, I directed the conversation a little until I could dovetail off and say, “…yea, I’m glad you came today, I really enjoy spending time with you…’cause actually, the truth is, I really like you a lot…”
At this point I was stunned! I was hoping for this to happen, but definitely did not expect it. I am a pretty talkative person, and I was left speechless… which only increased…
I proceeded to explain to Ali that I wanted to get to know her better with the intention of seeing if God was leading us towards marriage and I wanted to ask her dad (who I knew would be in town for the weekend) for his permission to pursue a relationship with her. I also explained that I didn’t like the terms dating/boyfriend/girlfriend because of negative connotations that I had in my mind and so, while I didn’t know what exactly we should call it, I didn’t want to call it dating. At this point, I had no idea what Ali would say; I was pretty sure she liked me, but for all I knew she might look at me and say “that’s ridiculous, what’s your problem with dating?” I was really relieved when she not only accepted what I said but agreed with it too!
Tommy did begin to explain that he did not want to date. All four years of high school I had been anti-dating for various reasons. I had watched so many friends get hurt. My dream had always been to marry my best friend. Actually, I had MANY thoughts about who I wanted to marry and how I wanted it to look. My family and friends (with a few exceptions) always said that I was going to have to compromise, that “guys like that don’t exist”. Due to life’s circumstances, I had come to agree. I figured if I ever wanted to marry, I would have to date. And that I would have to compromise my standards. In essence, I had given up on my dreams. Here I sat and listened to a man describe exactly what I had always dreamed it would look like. I became more and more speechless! I knew he had no idea how much I agreed with him. He continued to explain for 20+ minutes. I sat as I heard my dream unfold. More and more in awe, more and more speechless, and more and more thinking I must be dreaming. The thought: “I can’t believe this is happening right now” played over and over in my head. Tommy did not meet my dreams… he exceeded them, and continues to daily. God is so good!
Engagement
Well, I had been contemplating proposing for a while, and had brought my parents into the discussion I was having with myself about a month prior. So, after lots of thought and discussion, I called them on Monday, August 6th to tell them that I was ready to ask Ali's dad for his permission to propose and that if everything went well, I planned to ask her on Saturday.
They gave their blessing and so the following morning (Tuesday) I called and spoke with Ali's dad about my desire to marry Ali and asked his permission to propose to her. He gave his permission and so I proceeded to purchase a ring and plan out the details of how I would propose.
I knew that Ali was scheduled to take her GRE Saturday morning; we were planning to celebrate the test being over that evening due to Ali’s request. So, I figured this would be a great opportunity to do something special without raising her suspicions.
Saturday came and I told Ali about this really neat place I had heard of on Lake Coeur D'Alene, where we could have a picnic dinner and watch the sunset, and asked if she wanted to go check it out. (We had a habit of watching sunsets, exploring new places, and being around water together) She said yes so off we went. We arrived at the lake, parked, and hiked the ten minutes or so in to find this great spot right on the water away from the crowds of people. We ate our dinner as the sun was setting and then just sat next to each other to watch the actual sunset. Everything was going great, I wanted to propose right as the sun was setting and the timing was working out perfectly. And then it occurred to me that we were both sitting, and I wanted her to be standing so I could kneel when I proposed. I thought to myself, "How am I going to get her to stand up?" I started wracking my brain trying to come up with some smooth natural way to get Ali up on her feet...but nothing came to mind. At this point I was watching the sun start to set, my adrenaline was going a mile a minute and I realized that I was starting to quiver with excitement/nervousness/trying to figure out how to get her to stand up.
By quiver he means shake violently. I was leaning up against Tommy and felt what seemed like convulsions! I thought: what is going on? Maybe his is getting cold? I have a coat on and he doesn’t… yep, maybe he is just cold? Still, I was getting very curious…
I knew I couldn't just sit there, so I said the only thing I could think of, "Could we stand up for a second?" "Sure...(as she stands up)...why?" "Umm...well...(as I'm standing up, now holding the ring in its box behind my back)..." So once she was up I turned to face her and started into my mini speech.
His voice was shaking and as he turned to face me and reached to hold me hand I thought: oh my goodness! Is this really happening?! Is he proposing?! In case he wasn’t I told myself: no, couldn’t be.
I told her how I was amazed at how God had brought us to where we were and had grown our friendship like He had, and that I was awed with who she was and with the fact that I had been blessed to have her a part of my life for the last five months. I continued to say "...and I look forward to spending the next five months, and five years, and fifty years, and the rest of my life with you. I love you. So, Alison Marie Weaver," (as I got down on one knee) "will you marry me?" She gave an excited yes! and the rest is history.
Yes, he was proposing!! I still can’t believe it. The ring is perfect (he picked it out). It has been a whirl-wind. If I didn’t have a ring on my finger, and wasn’t planning a wedding, I would question whether or not Tommy is just one big fantasy I created. He continues to be more than I asked for and better than I could have imagined. God had such an amazing story planned… I can’t wait to see what is on the pages to come.
Ali and I (Tommy) have been attending the same church (New Community) in Spokane for the past four years; she was a small group leader for a college women’s group, and I worked at the church as an intern and then on staff. So we knew about each other and occasionally ran into one another at different times, but we really wouldn’t have considered ourselves to be friends (even acquaintances would have been a stretch). I remember being impressed with what I heard of Ali and in the little interaction we did have, but since I really didn’t know her and our circle of friends didn’t overlap, I never got past the thought: “she seems like someone I could really like to get to know.”
Well, this past February we ran into each other again at a prayer and worship night at New Community and I was once again impressed with Ali and thought to myself, “man, it’s too bad we don’t know each other better, I wonder if anything could be done about that...” As a result, I became much more aware of her presence on Sunday mornings and looked forward to seeing her and possibly “running into her” casually as everyone milled about before and after the services. Well, I wasn’t really sure what to do, but since I knew I definitely didn’t want to just sit back and do nothing (I was way too interested in Ali to be content with that) I decided that the best thing to do was pray and ask God to intervene somehow. So I did; I told God that I really desired to get to know Ali better, but I didn’t want to move forward unless it was clear that this was part of His plan. God worked on me for a few weeks and actually brought me to a place where I could honestly say that I could be content even if Ali wasn’t for me (though I was really hoping that wasn’t the case).
So I focused on school and post-graduation planning and started to pursue an aviation job that would take me away from Spokane. In the meantime, I didn’t avoid Ali, but I also didn’t go out of my way to talk to her. Then came the Sunday before spring break at the end of March; I ran into Ali (quite unintentionally) and her friends and as we chatted she invited me up to her house to have dinner with her and her roommates later that week.
I (Ali) had no interest in Tommy at this point. I had seen him from a distance and had run into him multiple times, but really didn’t know him. He was someone that I perceived as really cool, and I was interested in getting to know him, but as far as romantic interest- there was none. I am pretty traditional and if I had any interest in him I never would have invited him over- that would have been me, a female initiating. I actually partially felt bad that he was eating alone, I hate eating alone. I enjoy getting to know people, so Rachie (one of my housemates) and I invited him to dinner.
It turned out that it was totally innocent; I was house sitting for some friends and Ali felt bad for me having dinner by myself and thought it would be nice for me to be able to eat with some other people. Of course I accepted the invitation gladly and went up later that week to eat with them. Now at this point, I still wasn’t convinced that I could pursue her, so I spent the time on the way to and from her house talking myself into being ok with just being friends and not getting any hopes up. The three or so hours that I spent at her house that night were great and I came away thinking that I definitely liked her and wanting to hope that maybe God was answering my prayer and giving me the go ahead to pursue her.
I like to say Tommy spent four hours at our house. I was very impressed by his intentionality and genuine interest in everyone at the table. He asked each person specific questions about there lives. He brought the conversation past surface questions effortlessly. I really enjoyed dinner with him, and Rachie, and Dustin. What I was not ready for was the next morning! I woke up thinking about Tommy! I felt ridiculous! I thought: Ali, how can you like someone you have only spent 4 hours with?! However, the thoughts about Tommy didn’t go away. So, I combated them with prayer. I decided each time I thought about Tommy, I would just pray: Lord, if these desires are from you, may I win his heart quickly, for in several weeks I go home to California. At this point, I had NO idea he was interested in me. He had shown no signs at dinner of being interested in me at all. I thought I was praying a ridiculous prayer. Basically, I thought I was asking for a miracle. There were about 8 weeks of school left and I was going to be spending the next 2 of them in Israel.
Well, more opportunities arose over the next two months to spend time together in groups, and then by ourselves on occasion and it didn’t take me long to decide that I wanted to pursue a relationship with Ali on more serious terms. I had already decided that God had given me the green light and so after speaking with my parents about my interest in Ali, I decided that I would tell Ali about my feelings on a hike we had already planned for later that week.
Ok, I always hated it when girls ditched girls for guys. I had watched so many friends do it to me, that I swore I would never do that. Well, I was hanging out with one of my good friends Liv, and Tommy called to see if I wanted to go sit at the hanger while he manned the radio so a friend of his could fly, but he wanted me to go within the hour. I was worried that if I declined his invitation he would interpret it as me rejecting him. So, with knots in my stomach, I cut my time with Liv short and went to the hanger with Tommy. One of the things that impressed me the most in all these times of hanging out with Tommy is that each time we hung out, he asked my plans for the next day or rest of the week. Then, whenever he invited me to do something, he would mention what he knew I already had planned. For example, when he invited me to go to the hanger he said “I know you were going to grade the psychology exams, so you don’t have to come, but I was wondering if you wanted to come grade them and keep me company while my friend flies.” I was very impressed that he both remembered and considered my schedule each time we hung out. (the best part… he still does!)
So the day of the hike came, and after picking Ali up at her house, we drove to the house where I lived and walked from there to the trailhead.
It was before this hike that I said to my housemate Amy: “Ok, if he doesn’t make his intentions clear tonight, I have to pull back. My heart is too invested. I am too interested in him to hang out one-on-one if this isn’t going anywhere.” I knew that I needed to place boundaries on our time if my heart was going places other than friendship and his wasn’t.
My initial thought had been that I would express my interest to Ali when we got to a waterfall that is on the hike; however, once we got there, we discovered that we had company…mosquitos. So, needless to say, we didn’t stay there but kept on hiking as I switched over to plan B – sit on the bluff overlooking the town and tell her then. I hadn’t intended on doing this part of the hike initially, so I didn’t have a pre-planned route to get from the waterfall to the bluff. Basically that meant taking trails that looked like they went in the direction I was trying to go and hoping they actually made it there. I knew there were enough trails that we would get there, and, worse case scenario, it would just take a little longer than it might otherwise have taken, which, given the fact that I was really enjoying our time together, wasn’t a bad thing at all.
Well, we made it, and found a nice spot to sit, rest, drink some water, and talk while looking over the town. We talked about random things for a little while and finally I decided, “ok, it’s time.” So, I directed the conversation a little until I could dovetail off and say, “…yea, I’m glad you came today, I really enjoy spending time with you…’cause actually, the truth is, I really like you a lot…”
At this point I was stunned! I was hoping for this to happen, but definitely did not expect it. I am a pretty talkative person, and I was left speechless… which only increased…
I proceeded to explain to Ali that I wanted to get to know her better with the intention of seeing if God was leading us towards marriage and I wanted to ask her dad (who I knew would be in town for the weekend) for his permission to pursue a relationship with her. I also explained that I didn’t like the terms dating/boyfriend/girlfriend because of negative connotations that I had in my mind and so, while I didn’t know what exactly we should call it, I didn’t want to call it dating. At this point, I had no idea what Ali would say; I was pretty sure she liked me, but for all I knew she might look at me and say “that’s ridiculous, what’s your problem with dating?” I was really relieved when she not only accepted what I said but agreed with it too!
Tommy did begin to explain that he did not want to date. All four years of high school I had been anti-dating for various reasons. I had watched so many friends get hurt. My dream had always been to marry my best friend. Actually, I had MANY thoughts about who I wanted to marry and how I wanted it to look. My family and friends (with a few exceptions) always said that I was going to have to compromise, that “guys like that don’t exist”. Due to life’s circumstances, I had come to agree. I figured if I ever wanted to marry, I would have to date. And that I would have to compromise my standards. In essence, I had given up on my dreams. Here I sat and listened to a man describe exactly what I had always dreamed it would look like. I became more and more speechless! I knew he had no idea how much I agreed with him. He continued to explain for 20+ minutes. I sat as I heard my dream unfold. More and more in awe, more and more speechless, and more and more thinking I must be dreaming. The thought: “I can’t believe this is happening right now” played over and over in my head. Tommy did not meet my dreams… he exceeded them, and continues to daily. God is so good!
Engagement
Well, I had been contemplating proposing for a while, and had brought my parents into the discussion I was having with myself about a month prior. So, after lots of thought and discussion, I called them on Monday, August 6th to tell them that I was ready to ask Ali's dad for his permission to propose and that if everything went well, I planned to ask her on Saturday.
They gave their blessing and so the following morning (Tuesday) I called and spoke with Ali's dad about my desire to marry Ali and asked his permission to propose to her. He gave his permission and so I proceeded to purchase a ring and plan out the details of how I would propose.
I knew that Ali was scheduled to take her GRE Saturday morning; we were planning to celebrate the test being over that evening due to Ali’s request. So, I figured this would be a great opportunity to do something special without raising her suspicions.
Saturday came and I told Ali about this really neat place I had heard of on Lake Coeur D'Alene, where we could have a picnic dinner and watch the sunset, and asked if she wanted to go check it out. (We had a habit of watching sunsets, exploring new places, and being around water together) She said yes so off we went. We arrived at the lake, parked, and hiked the ten minutes or so in to find this great spot right on the water away from the crowds of people. We ate our dinner as the sun was setting and then just sat next to each other to watch the actual sunset. Everything was going great, I wanted to propose right as the sun was setting and the timing was working out perfectly. And then it occurred to me that we were both sitting, and I wanted her to be standing so I could kneel when I proposed. I thought to myself, "How am I going to get her to stand up?" I started wracking my brain trying to come up with some smooth natural way to get Ali up on her feet...but nothing came to mind. At this point I was watching the sun start to set, my adrenaline was going a mile a minute and I realized that I was starting to quiver with excitement/nervousness/trying to figure out how to get her to stand up.
By quiver he means shake violently. I was leaning up against Tommy and felt what seemed like convulsions! I thought: what is going on? Maybe his is getting cold? I have a coat on and he doesn’t… yep, maybe he is just cold? Still, I was getting very curious…
I knew I couldn't just sit there, so I said the only thing I could think of, "Could we stand up for a second?" "Sure...(as she stands up)...why?" "Umm...well...(as I'm standing up, now holding the ring in its box behind my back)..." So once she was up I turned to face her and started into my mini speech.
His voice was shaking and as he turned to face me and reached to hold me hand I thought: oh my goodness! Is this really happening?! Is he proposing?! In case he wasn’t I told myself: no, couldn’t be.
I told her how I was amazed at how God had brought us to where we were and had grown our friendship like He had, and that I was awed with who she was and with the fact that I had been blessed to have her a part of my life for the last five months. I continued to say "...and I look forward to spending the next five months, and five years, and fifty years, and the rest of my life with you. I love you. So, Alison Marie Weaver," (as I got down on one knee) "will you marry me?" She gave an excited yes! and the rest is history.
Yes, he was proposing!! I still can’t believe it. The ring is perfect (he picked it out). It has been a whirl-wind. If I didn’t have a ring on my finger, and wasn’t planning a wedding, I would question whether or not Tommy is just one big fantasy I created. He continues to be more than I asked for and better than I could have imagined. God had such an amazing story planned… I can’t wait to see what is on the pages to come.
Friday, September 7, 2007
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
